What is Parenting Mediation?

Mediation during parenting transitions can be a very helpful process. No matter which scenario applies to you, mediation can be supportive of turning ‘win-lose’ thinking into ‘win-win’ thinking for everyone. Family mediators can be considered parenting coaches when used in coordination with a family counsellor.

Separation/Divorce

You can work with a mediator and your soon to be ex-partner during a separation or divorce to create a parenting plan. This plan can help you identify how you will each care for your child, how holidays will be divided up and what amount of time your child spends with each of you. The cost of fighting these issues out through lawyers can be very expensive and stressful. In other situations, such as dividing property it may make sense to hire a professional to make those decisions. When it comes to decisions about your children...you are the experts! Don’t give that decision making power away. Let me help guide you through the process.

Blended Families

With the sheer number of divorced families it stands to reason that many couples entering into new relationships both already have children. When these families come together there are many changes that need to occur. There are ex-partners, step brothers/sisters and step parents to be engaged.  As with separation/divorce it is important to keep the focus on the children. What benefits them? How do you coordinate the everyday care of the children and help them manage the new relationships? Often changes to one of both of the existing parenting plans need to be considered in order for the newly created family unit to work smoothly. Creating a parenting plan is an incredibly helpful process for all parties to participate in. If teenage children (or even tweens) are part of the equation, allow them to have a voice and be part of the process also. Getting their buy-in early on in the process will certainly help with the success of the transition.

Post Divorce

Whether you created a parenting plan years ago that now requires a change due to circumstances or the child’s age or you would like to put one in place now to ensure more stability and routine around your parenting roles, mediation can help save you a lot of time and stress. Many families repeatedly go back to their lawyers or worse -court -when they are trying to resolve a conflict after divorce. There is nobody that knows your children better than you do. I understand that bitterness and anger still may play a role in decision making with your ex-partner. Using one neutral third party to help you both work through these issues on your timeline while saving your money makes good sense.

Parent Teen

You can work with you teenager during a conflict. Often people find communicating with their teen difficult and think that counselling may be an option to help them with anger problems. In many cases it is a communication problem that leads to frustration. Both the parent(s) and the teen have difficulty seeing things from the other’s perspective and do not know how to adequately express their needs and expectations. Having those conversations with a neutral third party can help bridge the communication gap and guide you through a process to create a parent-teen contract.  Mediation allows the teen to have a voice and play an active role in identifying roles, responsibilities and consequences. For example you could discuss behaviour at home or the expectations of a young adult using the family car. (Note: If counselling is needed, Families First Mediation partners with an excellent Family counsellor right in the same office.)